Attention Seeking

Well, I'm officially a believer that there is no such thing as a normal pregnancy. Would it be so horrible? Ugh. Anyway, Mr. or Miss Baby T2 decided they weren't getting enough attention which resulted in mommy rushing to Barnes on 1/31 to the pregnancy assessment center. It was a Tuesday morning (the day of the aforementioned flash mob) and I was excited for the day. I started my typical morning routine with a trip to the toilet to potty and discovered lots of bright red blood. My initial shock told me, "well...this isn't right." Horrified at what it could mean at 19 weeks, I called the exchange (it's 6 am mind you) to ask for guidance. The nurse told me that she would page my doctor and I should get a call back in 30 minutes. 30 minutes!?! Really? Let's just say that 30 minutes took forever and I paced back and forth between the bathroom and bedroom. I had no idea what I would do if they told me to go to the ER since I was home alone with Silas and daycare was 20 minutes outside of home. These are times when you really understand why a child ideally has two parents. It's alot for one person to handle - particularly when there is a crisis. So...I first called Amanda because I knew she'd calm me down and then called my mom to let her know she needed to be on standby for a trip to St. Louis depending on what was going on. Let's just say I think this may be the most I've ever heard Nana freaked out even though she stayed calm. I decided I needed to call our neighbor Jackie to see if Si could hang out with her if I had to go to the city. Worst case scenario, Nana could pick him up there.

In the back of my mind I had my friend Allison in my mind. She had a similar bleeding experience and while she had increased monitoring and restrictions, her baby was doing well. Perhaps I would be fine too. I also tried going to the bathroom again and this time it was clear so I knew I was not full fledged hemmoraging.

The doctor finally called back 40 minutes later and told me to go to the pregnancy assessment center at Barnes. Amanda offered to meet me there which I felt bad about because she would be missing work and because I didn't want her to relive the loss of Abigale which was approaching one year ago. However, I knew that if there was bad news I couldn't be there alone. I opted not to call the emergency line for BJ's training until I knew what was going on. If called it would be hours before he could get to me so I thought it best to just wait.

Fortunately Silas happily went to Jackie's house to play with choo choo's, EI (Eli), and Jada. I didn't hit much traffic and quickly found my way to where I needed to be at Barnes. They had me undress and immediately started the process to admit in. The nurse mentioned that she hoped I wouldn't have to spend the night...what??? It was 7:30 am. They checked all my vitals and listened for babies heart beat. Everything was fine - music to my ears.

After waiting a bit to see the nurse, she came in and said she thought this was as a result of the placenta previa I had been diagnosed with just four days earlier. She was very informative and even giggled at the "coincidence" at how quickly I had a complication after being diagnosed. She also indicated that she knew I was on "pelvic rest" and I told her that I had not been told that. She seemed shocked and told me I had to be my own advocate and that there should not be anything "down there" for any reason. I was pretty upset with my doctor, and still am, for not taking this precautionary measure that could have caused me to lose the baby. They had really minimized this concern. This will be addressed at my appointment on 2/14. Ugh. I asked if there were any other precautions I should be made aware of (i.e., lifting Silas) and was told just to watch for signs of stress on my body. Before we left she brought in a very old ultrasound machine and let me actually see that baby was okay. Such a relief.

Alas, I was not able to be in the flash mob at work and I was very sad. I went home and picked up Silas. After we had lunch we both took a long nap which was nice. We also skipped Little Gym that night because I didn't want to over do it. BJ finally called at about 8:00 pm and was upset with me that I had not called and also at the doctor for not telling us about pelvic rest. Obviously, he was just concerned.

I am feeling better now although for about a week I had a lot of pain. Fortunately, we attended dada's graduation from the Illinois Department of Corrections training on 2/9. We're so happy to have him around more and to gain some stability in our lives. Perfect timining for Baby T2! We've still got nothin' for names for this little rocker in my tummy. Still shocking how much more movement I feel as compared to Silas.

My next doctor's appointment is on 2/14. <3

Time is flying...

Well, since my last post I have had one standard appointment and the big anatomy scan. The appointment went fine other than having an abnormally long wait time to see the doctor and the doctor made me cry before leaving the office. I am quite sure I've mentioned this before, but I'm totally hormonal and the doc hit a touchy subject for me. Upon leaving the room, the doctor turned to ask me if I intended to do any of the genetic testing - quad screen or an amnio. Honestly, I only know of one person who has done an amnio and it was because other testing had pointed to a concern. I had this conversation at the appointment previously and I wasn't sure why the doctor was bringing it up again. I pointed out that I am aware that I am an anxious person and testing can indicate false positives (obviously not the amnio, although an amnio can be harmful to the baby). I didn't want to spend the next 20 weeks worrying if something might be wrong and then things be fine. She told me she needed to tell me because I was "running out of time." Apparently you need to have an amnio by 21 weeks. Long story short, I left the office in tears because the doctor was making me question my decision and BJ was away at basic training in Springfield. I had a talk with Amanda on my drive home and she reassured me that I had made the right decision. I just hate questioning myself!

The anatomy scan was on 1/27. I had asked my mom to go with me for fear BJ would not make the appointment and I'd be alone if they told me any concerns. The appointment was at 2:15 and this was typically about the time BJ should be returning to Grafton from Springfield. So, my dad played with Si while we went to the appointment. My nerves were high: 1) because of the previous conversation with the doctor at my appointment, 2) BJ wasn't there, and 3) the receptionist was AWFUL! We arrived 35 minutes early and she spent the entire time entering my new insurance information (yet another stressor as a result of our switch due to BJ's job). Fortunately I was able to relax once I saw our sweet little babe. It was such a different experience from seeing Silas at the same point in development. I was amazed at how active the baby was (arms at the side and then above the head, opening and closing hands, and rubbing its feet together). So cool to have a visual of what is going on in there!

BJ arrived at about 2:50 and the tech was just getting ready to take a look at gender. We have opted for a surprise but apparently there are still tests they need to complete in that "area." They told us to turn our heads, but we didn't really feel that was necessary. Upon asking the tech if she would have been able to tell us the gender, she said, "I know what you are having." BJ's cheeks were flushed red. It was killing him that we could know and he almost caved - just like with Silas! I was cracking up. He asked me if I was sure I didn't want to know and I told him if he wanted to know then he could ask. Proud to report that it is still a surprise! :) I must say that I think determining a name would be FAR easier if we could just focus on one, but it is kind of cool to imagine waiting to hear the doctor announce the sex.

There is a doctor who is watching the entire process and did not see any soft markers of concern. I was so pleased to hear this! However, an internal ultrasound did reveal that I have placenta previa. The doctor seemed optimisic that the placenta could move as the uterus grows over the next 20 weeks. Worst case scenario I would need to have a c-section. Can't say I'd want this, but I'd much rather it be my issue than something wrong with the baby. They will most likely do another ultrasound down the road to verify if the placenta has moved or not. It was slightly humorous that when they stated they would do an internal, my mother fled the room for the waiting room. She cracks me up.

This is the beginning of week 4 of 5 for BJ's training so hopefully we'll have a routine in the next couple of weeks beginning to be established. Work has been nuts and I've been completely overwhelmed, but I know this will pass. It always does, but there have definitely been some hormonal tears shed. In addition to typical work responsibilities, I'm participating in a secret flash mob during the school assembly this week. So, baby will have their first performance at 20 weeks gestation. :)

Next appointment is on Valentine's Day.

Updates, Updates, Updates

Ugh. I have been absolutely horrible with this blog! I'm annoyed with myself, but it's important to me to do this so Baby T2 has a record of the pregnancy leading up to delivery. Since my last post, I had my first appointment with OBGYN Consultants at the Center for Advanced Medicine in STL. Can I just say that this is NOT going to be the same experience as my previous pregnancy and I am so excited! I had to answer several basic intake questions and have my yearly girly appointment. However, the most exciting part was having another internal ultrasound! I was sad I hadn't asked BJ to come along thinking this would be the basic heart monitor on the belly appointment. We had never seen Silas at 12 weeks and I thought the experience was pretty cool. Baby flipped and flopped around on the screen. I blame this on mommy's morning hot tea. :) The doctor said everything looked great!

Before leaving I scheduled the anatomy scan and signed up for another research study. This one requires me to wear a "watch" on my wrist for a week and keep a log of my sleep habits, caffeine in-take, and exercise. I'll have to do this 4 times total during the pregnancy and get a $25 Target gift card each time. Fun! Before leaving I had to give NINE vials of blood! Eeeks! It wasn't too bad though.

Part of me thinks I'm nuts, but I swear I started feeling movement around 11-12 weeks. On the drive to Danville for Christmas I swear I felt baby almost the entire trip. Now that I'm 17 weeks I really should be feeling more, but it seems like there has been a slight decrease. I'm sure I'm just being paranoid.

As far as the anatomy scan, we've elected to let this pregnancy be a surprise! I had always thought there was no way based on my personality that I could hold out for this information when it was readily available, but I guess with age and life experiences I've come to realize that this information just doesn't matter. More than anything I just want a positive anatomy scan that reveals a healthy baby!

BJ started a new job on 1/9 and will be gone for 5 weeks except for the weekends. I have been totally emotional about this for unknown reasons. I am beginning to question if there are extra female hormones raging through my body. I've found I can cry at the drop of a hat. The first week was tough since Silas got sick and I don't do well with vomit. I was totally wiped out, but thankful that nana came to give a hand. I've been feeling icky the last couple of days. My next doctor's appointment is tomorrow (1/17) and I'm anxious to hear that heartbeat. The anatomy scan will be 1/27. BJ can't go since he'll be working so I asked nana if she wanted to accompany me. It doesn't feel right to go alone. If BJ would like, we'll pay for a separate 3D ultrasound so he can take a peek at Baby T2. :) There has been some name discussion, but nothing has definitively been determined yet. We won't reveal this information until arrival!

Updates

I haven't done nearly well enough with keeping up with this information so here are updates since last time. I had given blood again and my hormone levels came back in the 14,000's! I still need to look back at what I recorded for Silas, but this seems SO high. It was additional confirmation that I might be having multiples along with other strange signs that kept coming up. Besides the medical factors, I was amazed at how I was being inindated with TWINS! I was holding meetings for twins, a parent brought twins to a meeting, etc. It was definitely in my face.

My first ultrasound appointment was scheduled for 11/3 - my 33rd birthday! What a present! BJ went with me which was a good thing because it ended up being more emotional than I anticipated. Immediately after the ultrasound began it was obvious that there was not one, but two sacs. I can't say that we had hoped for twins or that I think it would be easy, but it was exciting to think about the possibility of TWO babies. However, not long after the two sacs were identified it was evident that something wasn't right. The technician continued to probe for anything that would indicate two babies and didn't come up with anything. She indicated that sometimes a baby can be hiding; however, the doctor told us not to be optimistic that there would be a baby since we should have been able to see a heartbeat by now. The positive was that the 2nd sac held a perfect little babe with a heart rate of 122 beats per minute.

A follow-up appointment was scheduled for today (11/18 - 9 weeks). I was very anxious about going to the appointment. I didn't have any reason to think things weren't going well, but the time between appointments is always frustrating. It is so reassuring to hear that heart beat. It was obvious that there is only one baby today as the 2nd sac hadn't continued to grow. The healthy baby had a heart rate of 178 beats per minute. This seemed high to me! The technician also kept saying that she thought the baby looked "big" which lead Amanda to the nickname, "Tubby T." I'm not sure I'm on board with this one if there is a cute little girl in there. The doctor was pleased with my progress and noted that the sac is slightly small but this isn't atypical with twins. I have officially been released from Wash U which is bittersweet. I have never had a doctor that made me feel so supported and we are so very thankful for Dr. Keller's intervention. My next appointment will be with the Generalists Group at Center for Advanced Medicine. I will deliver in St. Louis at Barnes Jewish Hospital.

Things are moving along. I have never been more exhausted in my life, but so excited for Silas to be a big brother. Today he received a choo choo has a gift from the baby. We're still not sure he gets it.

First Blood Test

It's funny how quickly you forget all things that go into the process of having a baby. It had completely slipped my mind that I needed to do a blood test for confirmation. In true Kelly fashion, I had arranged with the doctor's office to have my script for blood work faxed directly to LabCorp in Maryville. Once I arrived, they informed me that they didn't have anything and couldn't draw my blood. This made me relatively grouchy. The doctor's office had closed for the day so I had to wait until the next morning and opted to have the fax sent to work so it would be in my possession. So, on 10/19 I had blood drawn which confirmed a beta level of 1,094. Now, I will be completely honest, even after questioning I'm not sure I completely get what this level means. The nurse informed me that if I had given blood on 10/15 (one month from my last period) then they would have expected the number to be 100. I asked why my number was so high and questioned if this was an indication of multiples. The nurse said the number was high and confirmed at least one baby, but couldn't say more until I give more blood. So....I give blood again this Wednesday and then they said we get to have our first ultrasound the week of Halloween! I'm so excited!!! The cramping has stopped which is nice, but I feel SO tired and keep having crazy dreams. I've also noticed a decrease in appetite, but I'm not nauseous - thank goodness. So far, so good!

Hooray!

I'M PREGNANT!!! Oh, it really is such a surreal feeling. I was super anxious Friday night knowing that I could "test" the next morning. Silas had a rough night and ended up in bed with us around 4:30 am. Around 7, I woke up and really had to "go," but I knew if I got up there was a chance of waking everyone up. I couldn't wait any longer and crept into the bathroom. Fortunately, the three minute wait to get my results seemed to fly by and I stared in amazement at the blue stick that read, "pregnant." I'm not sure what it is about those tests, but I found myself blinking to be sure that I was reading it correctly. The next thing that popped in my mind is that I had to tell BJ. The problem is that I had surprised him with the news of our pregnancy with Si, but he hadn't been home when I tested. I immediately started trying to think up some amazing way to break the news, and finally snuck out of the bedroom to take a picture of the test. My options were to hide the test and purchase a "big bro" shirt for Silas that day while BJ was in Belleville taking an HVAC class and surprise him when he got home or make him breakfast in bed. I couldn't stand to make him wait so I dashed down the stairs to the basement to get a bag of pancake mix. While in the basement, I heard the floor shaking from above and knew that Silas had gotten up and let the dogs out of our bedroom. I ran back up the stairs, darted into the kitchen, and asked Silas to take something to dada. I handed him the stick and he took off for the bedroom. I chased him with the camera, but failed to get any good shots in the dark. I told BJ that Silas had a present for him and BJ asked if he was "holding pee." Goodness. He finally read the test and smiled. I patted him on the chest and told him, "good job."

We told Silas that mommy has a baby in her belly. He has been super cute about the whole thing, but is clearly clueless. He keeps asking, "where did the baby go?" When given the choice of a brother or sister, he chooses a sister. Time will tell. I really can't say that I have an opinion one way or the other. I think it would be really cool for Si to have a brother or a sister. I am just so hopeful for a healthy pregnancy. I am trying to eat better and drink lots of liquids. The official due date per babycenter.com is 6.21.12. Eleven days different than Si's due date.

I'm waiting until at least our first doctor's appointment to break the news. I put a smiley face on facebook and Amanda knew immediately what this meant. She called me with excitement, so just like with Si - she is the first to know. :) I have been tired, but no other miserable side effects at this point. I am just so happy.

Progress

I gave blood again this past Friday (10/7) and anxiously awaited the results over the weekend. I'm trying not to become overly hopeful so I don't get my heart broken, but it's a struggle because this month I could really FEEL when I ovulated. I KNEW my progesterone levels were going to be better. Alas, I had to contact Wash U to get the results from work because I dropped my cellphone in the port-a-pottie at the Kelly Miller Circus over the weekend and haven't receive my replacement phone. They giggled at my call today and looked in my chart for the results. My progesterone was at an 8.7 (still below the goal of 10, but progress from the month before). The waiting game continues, and if this isn't the month then they will increase my dose again next month.