Wow! I've been awful about keeping up with updates. Today is officially day 25 of bed rest and unfortunately I've become quite lethargic. It's difficult to be motivated to do anything when you're stuck in bed, but that is about to come to an end. Tonight I'm being admitted to the hospital at 7 pm. The goal is to have my cervix softened so they'll be inserting a string that has cervadel on it. Apparently, this has to be in place for 12 hours so we'll be spending the night at the hospital. In the morning, they'll give me pitocin to force contractions. I'm still feeling unsure about this whole process, but I guess it just falls into the unknown territory...something you can read about and talk to others about, but not fully ever feel prepared. I still wish I'd be able to use some strategies to help me work through the pain, but I have to let that go. I've come to terms with the fact that I may just have to use medication, but an epidural still scares me just as much as the pain of childbirth. In one of our classes, they recommended coming up with a "safety" word to allow your coach to know that you really needed the epidural and you weren't just having a weak moment. So, last night I came up with "bananas"...not sure where it came from, but BJ can't stand bananas so I guess it will symbolize that I can't stand the pain. From what I've read, pitocin slows the natural production of endorphines in the body which is the reason why labor is so much more difficult when you're induced. Since I was dilated to 1 1/2 as of Wednesday at my appointment, so hopefully my body will cooperate with this process and indicate in some way that it's ready for this.
It's been a drama packed week and Baby T's arrival will be a blessing amidst it all. Sienna had her final heart surgery this past Tuesday, so my parents have been all over the state. The plan was for them to come to our house once I was being induced, but my mom came on Wednesday because I was so distressed over us finding out BJ is being laid off from his job at detention as of June 10th. We were definitely thrown for a loop and it's horrible timing. To add to the fun for my parents, they're typically in Boise, Idaho celebrating our niece Addison's birthday (5/24) which they were unable to do this year. So, we've been fortunate to have my mom's help this week. It was nice having the reassurance that if something happened she'd be here to take me to the hospital and also someone to talk to rather than being overwhelmed with my daily I'm paranoia. Pops has been driving back and forth to Peoria every day to visit with Sienna, and also helping to care for Aunt Lillian (she turned 95 on 5/18). Drama, drama, drama!
I'm just ready to meet my little man and hope with all my might that he is healthy! I know in the upcoming weeks we're going to be faced with challenges we've never known before. I wish it was just the addition of a newborn to the mix, but we'll also be working on the job hunt for BJ and learning how to live on one income. We'll make it though!
3 comments:
Hey girl, I know you can handle whatever comes your way! I've been praying for you, BJ and Baby T! I have faith that BJ will find another job without a problem. Keep the faith! Good luck tomorrow!!
Can't wait for the next update you will do great! Meds or no meds! :)
Cindy
Kelly, God never closes a door without opening a window. I pray your husband will find a new job and that the baby will be here soon! You are blessed to have a mother as loving as your mom. She holds a special place in my heart. Take care and I check in again! God bless. Mary Vandenberg
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